I don't DO dialogue

[terribleturnip]

I just got an e-mail that contained this line:

"Can we dialogue about this some?"

Because I am a professional I will respond to it here, in my journal, so that I can resist sending a return e-mail that contains the phrase:

"Dialogue is a noun, dinkwad."

Comments

[thatliardiego.livejournal.com]

You need to incentivize him to respond off-line.

[giantsloth.livejournal.com]

How are you going to leverage the functionality of your critical path deliverables if you don't dialogue?

[3fingeredsalute.livejournal.com]

You just reminded me of a bit from Demetri Martin's comedy routine (I just saw it last night) which cracked me up.

It’s weird the way "finger puppet" sounds ok as a noun.

Just as a FYI, Merriam Webster (http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/dialogue) does show both the noun you reference, as well as a verb the aforementioned "dinkwad" used appropriately. English is truly such a funny language. I think of it like a living organism... with leprosy, melanomas, several goiters and a wicked rash. How DO you explain to a non-English speaker that "temporary permanent" is something one does to their hair?

[dawntreader]

i'm on your side! BUT ... it's better than "conversate." that's what people in our office say they do. at least the form "to dialogue" is an actual word, even if it's HIGHLY annoying and incorrect.

[3fingeredsalute.livejournal.com]

Technically, it is correct. Shakespeare even used the word in that fashion.

I mean the business is not ended, as fearing to hear of it hereafter. But shall we have this dialogue between the Fool and the Soldier? Come, bring forth this counterfeit module has deceiv'd me like a double-meaning prophesier.

Source: "All's Well that End's Well", Act IV. Scene 3, Bertram

or

Dost dialogue with thy shadow?

Source: "The Life of Timon of Athens", Act II. Scene II, Apemantus

It has not been highly used until recently in bombastic boardrooms and middle-management communiques, but technically it is still correctly used.

[dawntreader]

the first one is used as a noun. "we have this dialogue." i have no problem with it.

the second one is used in the instance she's annoyed about as a verb. however, that was Shakespeare, and if the boobs in the bombastic boardroom also want to use Shakespearean iambic pentameter, by all means! they have my permission.

nice use of alliteration on "bombastic boardrooms" and "middle-management communiques" by the way. :)

[lowlandscot.livejournal.com]

Apemantus is described in the dramatis personae list as "a churlish philosopher." I'll bet on some dusty library shelf somewhere, there sits a PhD dissertation proving that Shakespeare had Apemantus use "dialogue" as a verb just to make him seem like an ass.

Buzzword Bingo!

[buglefly.livejournal.com]

You need to bookmark this page, http://isd.usc.edu/~karl/Bingo/bbbingo.html and each day print out a new "Buzzword Bing" card. Keep it handy, and through e-mails or meetings or telecons, you can have fun trying to claim a "Bingo" at work. It won't stop the buzzwords from flying -- but it makes the day a bit more entertaining! Enjoy!

[pyllgrum.livejournal.com]

See, it is like this: Your co-worker is lacking in creativity.

I suggest you tell him to just walk up to your desk and ask if you have time for intercourse.

[fountaingirl.livejournal.com]

Urg.

"No, but you can soliloquy nearby while I ignore you, if it makes you feel better."

[terribleturnip.livejournal.com]

Truthfully, I don't care whether it's technically correct or not. It's stupid. He means "let's talk about it" or "discuss" or "brawl like streetfighters". Honestly, if people would just say what they mean, instead of trying to "intellectualize" it, everyone would make fewer mistakes.

Plus, I wouldn't think so many people were dinkwads.

But now, let me get back to composing an e-mail to an Asian supplier where I need to get a "yes" or "no" answer on a vey uncomfortable topic. In a hurry.

(yeah...right....)

[skivee.livejournal.com]

I wonder if this isn't the result of simple linguistic drift.
Now, I would have used the phrase " Shall we enjoy enhanced chatification on this point"; but I'm from a foreign country.