It's not worth it...

[terribleturnip]

"Please don't jump, it's not worth it" is what someone said to a man who was threatening to jump off a ledge and kill himself. Which I find, despite the tragedy of the situation and the heartache/trauma that the person who uttered the phrase is going through, after the person then fell off the ledge and died anyway, (That would be so ME -- come to my senses and then freaking trip while getting off the damn ledge and landing the hard way), anyway, I find that one of those phrases that you SAY without realizing how utterly ridiculous it is.

I mean, I know what the person MEANT -- that whatever course of events has led you here, they aren't traumatic enough to kill yourself over. Not that jumping isn't worth it -- because, really, if you want the end result to be "Game Over" then jumping off the ledge will probably deliver the value you were looking for...in otherwords, "worth it."

Unless of course, the Good Samaritan was trying to warn the guy that really, it wasn't enough of a fall and, really, as a suicide attempt, this was not going to deliver the value -- find a taller building, or harder surface to land on.

On a smaller magnitude of phrases you utter but don't mean them the way they come out...I'm always telling taxi drivers and airline counter people to have a nice trip. They tell me to have a nice trip and I say "You, too!" which is just dumb, since they're not going anywhere. (And despite Brian Regan doing a really, really funny bit around this, I still can NOT keep myself from doing it.) There should be a phrase that just stands for "generic platitude exchanged". A sort of all-purpose "you too" that just means "hey, you have a good one as well, whatever the hell "one" you're going to have"....

I'd admire "have a good one" more if it then didn't leave me obsessing over what we both meant by "one"...but no good candidate for a replacement phrase comes to mind.

"Hey, you Franklin Roosevelt yourself!"

Nah, that won't work....

Comments

"Your'e right, let me just slide my foot rightAUUUGHTHUD!!!!............from the rocketeer!

[(Anonymous)]

Here's that life imytatin' art thing again. I read in Sunday's Post that a disturbed individual in fact tried to climb back inside Georgetown U. Hospital. (i think it was)... after parading on a ledge for some considerable time. Lost his balance and fell as he was trying to get back in after thinking more clearly. He landed real hard, but don't worry, he bounced right back! HAHAHAHA.....er, um. Actually , he survived with some serious but recoverable injuries.

[faithellen]

If someone is going to snarl up Beltway traffic during rushhour with a suicide attempt, the fucker needs to jump. It's only fair to everyone waiting.

My milk of human kindness? Come get some, baby.

[skivee.livejournal.com]

"...snarl up Beltway traffic during rushhour with a suicide attempt"
I'm thinkin' that folks who have been forced to sit for hours in sweltering traffic jams, because some "Oh Look At Me" Fuckhead has chosen to play out their drama in a way calculated to screw with thousands of other folks, should be allowed three free shots with a high-powered rifle.
Is that so wroooongah?

[queenmaggie.livejournal.com]

>There should be a phrase that just stands for "generic platitude exchanged"<

The phrase is "Thank you" Nothing more is really needed. Honest. It's okay. Miss Manners told me so.

Been there, done that, didn't find the pants

[navycryppie.livejournal.com]

I was about 18 or 19, going out early one morning for a river test on a boat that had been worked on...and out of the corner of my eye I see, then hear, a LARGE splash in the river. In my hometown there are three bridges the cross the Willamette, and bum #1 decides to jump off one of the 80 feet to the water ones. Brilliant. Face first, no less. Being the good samaritan I was, into the water I go, pulling his drunk and/or drugged body back to the boat. He kept mumbling over and over "where's my pants?" I sh!t you not, that's all he cared about. Must have been some sort of transient designer jeans...

And BTW, I HATE MEMPHIS, heat index right now: 116

Re: Been there, done that, didn't find the pants

[terribleturnip.livejournal.com]

Augh. I feel for you. I'm in the middle of my annual "I can NOT live someplace this damn hot" tirade -- and much cooler than Memphis!