Oct. 28th, 2009

terribleturnip: (percy)
Okay, that's a little dramatic. But clearly, I suck at Malaise. The whole, oh, I dunno, I just don't FEEL like doing anything, blah, the world sucks, why bother....

Like a hat, it's rare that it looks good on me and I can only wear it so long until it gets itchy. And then my hair looks like ASS, which makes me swear I'll never wear another one.

What's up with that, anyway? I can style my hair, use tools, hair products, even have a professional do it. And within four hours (assuming humidity is manageable and it's not raining) my hair is back to doing what it wants. If there's damp involved, I can't get from the salon to my car without my hair going back to its ur-style of alternating hanging and curling randomly with no rhyme, reason or thought to complimentary framing of my face.

But put a baseball cap on for two freaking minutes to run out and put away the trash cans, only because I planned poorly, do not have waterproof mascara on and it's raining. Two minutes of hat. An entire day of my bangs laying pressed down and extra-wonky. And I can wet them all I want, use all the hair product I want, but nooooo. If it doesn't involve shampoo, conditioner, they will be wonky and badfunky all day. Bastard hair.

But that's not where I was going with all of this )
terribleturnip: (willow)
I'm trying to distract myself. I'm almost done with a report, but am waiting on a report to run. And I am kicking myself -- all day I've had an incredible craving for Kentucky Fried Chicken (don't judge me) and I gave myself a firm talking to at lunchtime and had a sensible half a sandwich (Boarshead Rosemary and Sun-dried tomato ham with Boarshead Asiago sliced cheese. If that sounds like a Boarshead commercial, it is. It's da bomb and I HATE deli ham) and some mediocre coleslaw. Because, now, ALL I can think about is freaking fried chicken and those fake mashed potatoes. Big, Unreasonable Want. (Wow, band name? Nah, middle name.) Shoulda just had the chicken, I'd be disgusted with myself and I wouldn't need to eat it for months and months again.

So, naturally, my thoughts turn to Swedish Fish and kitten sandwiches.

www.swedishfish.com

Scroll over the "yes" and "no" to see the kitten. Click on the tv at the bottom of the page for some really funny ads.

Okay. I thought they were funny. But I'm possessed by dreams of the eleven herbs and spices and more grease than I eat in a week. So, take that with a grain of svensksa.
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