It's best for all of us that I don't have time for Women's Magazines

So, I'm sitting in the salon, my head covered in little squares of aluminum foil, making me feel like some kind of reverse-brownie, as we perpetuate the illusion that I get out in the sun and chlorine enough to still have highlights at my age..and while waiting for the timer to ring, the lovely Heather (thank you, Fetch, once again indebted) gives me one of the women's magazines...I dunno, let's say Redbook. The only one I know for sure is "MORE" which my mother gets and ( THAT one I recognize because it pisses me off on several levels. )