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terribleturnipA colleague was telling me about the New Year's party she went to, crowded, lots of drunks, enormous quantities of spilled beer...and as I was shuddering, said, "Hey, I just made sure I went out and bought a $29.99 dress so I could just throw it out after the party."
And I thought, perfect party description: It's the kind of party where you buy a $29.99 dress so you can just throw it out the next morning.
And now I want to build a party invitation around that...except that I can't stomach the thought of having that party in my own home. Not till spring, and you can do your spilling outside...
Also, as I know this journal has been a little sparse of late -- it's the very pinnacle of crunch time here at work -- I give you another "Only I..."
Only I could be on the phone with my boss's boss, having a very fraught with tension, high stakes conversation, and notice that my shoe is covered with dog crap. Which was pretty damn distracting, as my brain immediately broke out in full-scale warfare "You have to clean that off right now! Augh!" and "Focus on the phone conversation, it's been on your shoe all morning, you can wait 2 more minutes."
Easy access to wetwipes gave victory to the "clean it off right now" side and frankly, I think the act of cleaning dogsh*t off my shoes kept me calm and poised during the conversation.
Which probably reveals a lot about my personality.
But since I drove to work thinking...god, is that my own foot odor? These are new shoes...is there some chemical reaction going on? I gotta put some Gold Bond in my shoes, that's sorta icky....I'm just glad it wasn't ME.
And I thought, perfect party description: It's the kind of party where you buy a $29.99 dress so you can just throw it out the next morning.
And now I want to build a party invitation around that...except that I can't stomach the thought of having that party in my own home. Not till spring, and you can do your spilling outside...
Also, as I know this journal has been a little sparse of late -- it's the very pinnacle of crunch time here at work -- I give you another "Only I..."
Only I could be on the phone with my boss's boss, having a very fraught with tension, high stakes conversation, and notice that my shoe is covered with dog crap. Which was pretty damn distracting, as my brain immediately broke out in full-scale warfare "You have to clean that off right now! Augh!" and "Focus on the phone conversation, it's been on your shoe all morning, you can wait 2 more minutes."
Easy access to wetwipes gave victory to the "clean it off right now" side and frankly, I think the act of cleaning dogsh*t off my shoes kept me calm and poised during the conversation.
Which probably reveals a lot about my personality.
But since I drove to work thinking...god, is that my own foot odor? These are new shoes...is there some chemical reaction going on? I gotta put some Gold Bond in my shoes, that's sorta icky....I'm just glad it wasn't ME.
